An Unexpected Answer

I am nearly 33 weeks along now, which means about 7 weeks until my "due date."  This has made me reflect a lot on just how ready I am for everything: labor and birth, being a mom, and meeting my little boy.  Since day one of finding out I was pregnant, I have been excited for all of it.  I was, however, beginning to doubt myself in one area.  I have been reading a lot of birthing stories lately, with many of them talking about how connected they were to their baby during the pregnancy.  They talked about the love that was overflowing for their baby, and how their connection was extremely strong.  I began to question myself, asking if this is how I felt with my baby.  I knew that I loved him, and I knew that he was mine forever, but I wanted to feel that overpowering love connection with my baby like those I read about in stories.  Is it normal for first time moms to feel that way? Having never experienced a love for a child before, I didn't know exactly if what I was feeling at this point in my pregnancy was normal.

So, I said a prayer.  I told Heavenly Father my concern, and asked Him to help me strengthen my bond with my baby.

Never had I received an answer like the one I received for that particular prayer.

Today I had my first dream about my baby.  It was the most precious dream I have ever had.  In the past, I've dreamed about giving birth, being pregnant, and even breastfeeding, but this dream was different. It was the first one where I knew that the baby I was looking at was mine.

In my dream, I was still pregnant with Kaden, but for some reason, we were allowed to see him before he was born.  I have no idea how or why, but he was able to come out for a small visit, and then would have to go back in my belly to keep growing.   So there Chris and I were, meeting Kaden for the first time.  I let Chris hold him first, because all I wanted to do first was to look at Kaden.  With Kaden's head resting on Chris's shoulder, I stood behind Chris so I could look at Kaden's little face.  And that's when his eyes opened for the first time.

"Oh, Chris! His eyes are open!"

"Ooo! I want to see!" Chris walked over to the mirror to look at Kaden in the mirror, since he was still resting on Chris's shoulder.

With me still behind Chris, I looked again at Kaden, and that's when he saw me for the first time.  He looked at me, and just smiled.  He wouldn't stop smiling.  And in his smile, I could tell that he knew I was his momma.  In that moment, we were connected.  I could feel a huge amount of love for him wash over me instantaneously.

I realized that I had felt this love for him all along, it was just never given the opportunity to surface until now.  With this newly realized love, I am now more excited than ever to meet him in real life.  I never expected an answer to my prayers like that.  Heavenly Father knew exactly what I needed, and he let me see Kaden in a dream to answer my prayer.  What an amazing experience.

 I remember every detail about Kaden too.  His smile was beautiful.  He had bright blue eyes, short and fuzzy light brown hair, and he was wearing blue and white striped pajamas.