Kaden's Birth Story

I admit it. I was in denial. On Friday, July 22nd (my actual due date), I was in early labor and didn't know it. I spent the afternoon learning how to make raspberry jam by my mother-in-law, and by 3pm, I noticed that the mild cramps I had been occasionally experiencing for the past month had noticeably become a little more frequent. I messaged my doula-and-childbirth-educator aunt, Amy, about my frequent crampage.  She informed me that it is indeed a a sign of early labor, but that it could also go away just as quickly as it came.  I thought for sure that it would go away. For some reason, I didn't expect him to arrive until next week (actually, I think it was because I wanted to do one last super date with Chris before the baby came... I'm so selfish), BUT, Kaden definitely has a mind of his own, and he came when he wanted to.

Side note: this is also the day that my mom and sister, Sydney, flew up from Las Vegas to Seattle to be here for the birth. They were going to fly up later that week, but decided that flying up on my actual due date would give us some time to hang out before Kaden came. Little did we know that this would be perfect timing for them to arrive just in time for the birth

*****

That night, Chris and I spent our time in front of the TV while working on compiling the songs I wanted to listen to during labor.  I still experienced my cramps, but didn't pay too much attention to them. Chris, on the other hand, was completely convinced that I was in labor and made all the last minute preparations necessary.  Me? I just took a shower and sat around.  By about 2am, I gave in.  I noticed these cramps were becoming a little more intense and frequent.  "Alright, maybe we should start timing these contractions."  Good thing we did, too, because from that point on, labor was not slowing down at all. 

So, to conserve my energy for when I really needed it in labor, we tried going to sleep. Ya... good idea.  When I laid down is when I really needed to start focusing on my breathing during each contractions. Chris stayed up with me (as if he could go to sleep) to help me through the contractions by rubbing my back and helping my breathing to stay deep and relaxed.  

At 6:30am, I made some phone calls. First, I called Amy and told her what was up. Next I called my mom and told her that I was in labor so that she could leave her friend's house and come over to assist during the birth.  While she and Sydney were on their way, I called my midwife.  She instructed me to conserve my energy, to keep eating and drinking, and to call her again once I transitioned into active labor.  

7:30am is when Mom and Sydney arrived.  I heard them coming up the driveway, so I met them outside.  As they stepped out the car with their luggage, I greeted them by saying "Welcome... to the house of PAIN!"

At this point, Chris was WIPED OUT (we didn't get a wink of sleep that night). I sent him upstairs to sleep for a few hours, he was going to need his energy later too.

Meanwhile, us girls went and sat out on the deck in the backyard of my in-law's house (we are living with the, for the summer until Chris's grad  school starts). It was a perfectly sunny morning, and the three of us just talked in between my contractions.  I was getting to the point where it was more difficult to talk during my contractions, and I began moaning to cope with the intensity.

When my contractions began to get a little stronger, I decided to move into the family room and lay on the couch.  My moaning grew louder, and I had to concentrate on each one.  I made another phone call to the midwife, telling her how quickly things were progressing.

On the phone during a contraction

  She told me to keep fluids down and try to eat foods.  I had a bite of one cracker and threw it up (the body's way of clearing itself out to make room for the baby) .  We decided to just stick with coconut water to keep me hydrated and to keep my electrolytes up. TMI Side note:  I HIGHLY recommend coconut water during labor... not only for its nutritional value... I actually didn't mind throwing up because it tasted like coconut water (Yes, I was drinking that much).

After Chris woke up, he stayed by me during my contractions while making sure I had enough green smoothie for some extra nutrition. 

Chris: "Make a dramatic face for the camera!"

I lost track of time during labor... I honestly thought that all of active labor took 3 hours max.  So I can't really tell you how much time passed. All I know is that when the contractions got stronger, we moved upstairs to our bedroom, where we had planned to have the birth. I rocked back and forth on the yoga ball, which was the perfect height for kneeling.

Meanwhile, Chris was setting things up with my Aunt Amy in Utah. She is a doula and childbirth educator who I have counseled with my entire pregnancy, and it wouldn't seem right if she couldn't attend the birth in some way, shape or form.  So we decided to Skype with her! This was a first for everyone, including the midwives, but guys, it was wonderful! Once Chris got everything hooked up, he brought in the laptop and set it in front of me on a little side table.  

Amy could tell exactly what kind of labor support I needed, so she guided Chris through each technique, this is one technique that worked wonderfully, I am literally pulling all my weight on Chris's shoulders through the contractions. 

I should mention, by this time in my labor, I was LOUD and I didn't care who heard. I moaned in deep "O's" to help open up my cervix, which definitely worked because not long after, my water broke and mucus plug finally showed. Nothing like waiting till the last minute!

Pretty soon, I told Amy that I felt extremely constipated. "That's the baby's head," I heard her say, "Chris, call the midwife and tell her to come right now."  It was game time. While the midwife was on her way, I changed into a tankini top, and everyone else was working on filling up the pool with water.  

Guys, the water felt wonderful.  It helped take some of the weight off, and the warmth helped relax me and eased the intensity of each contraction.  The pool was also the perfect size and "squishiness" for leaning over.  While we waited for the midwife to come, Amy was there on the screen in front of me, helping me to cope with the intensity, and Chris was at my side.  I loved that I had the room to be in any position I wanted.  I could listen to my body to tell me what would be the most efficient way of birthing this baby.  For me, kneeling over the side of the tub with my knees spread apart allowed me to open my pelvis much wider than any laying down position would have. Looking back on it now, I think my laboring would have been much longer and more painful if I had to lay on my back.   

About 15 minutes later (I think), Traci, the midwife, and her assistant, Chelsea, arrived. And a good thing they did, because I was ready to push just as they got there! 

On the left is Chelsea and the right is Traci 

By this time, I was "in labor land" as they say.  I was completely in tune with my body, I shut everything else out. My eyes remained closed nearly the entire time from here on out, I was listening to my body so intently that I barely remember anything else going on around me. I remember voices talking around me, zippers of bags opening and closing, someone taking my blood pressure a couple times, someone else pressing a stethoscope onto my belly to measure the fetal heart rate, and people encouraging me. "You are doing great Julene!... That was a great push!... Channel the energy you are using to yell and force it down to help you push... I'm so proud of you!"

Unless they were talking directly to me, I didn't care who they were or what they were doing. They were just blurs. Traci remained behind me the whole time to measure my progress.  Chris remained close by to be ready to catch Kaden as soon as he emerged. 

"This has to be the ring of fire everyone talks about," I remember thinking to myself as I could feel Kaden's head get lower and lower.  I knew the only way to not feel it anymore was to just get through it.  Being afraid was not going to get me anywhere, I was designed to do this.  My body  got me this far, and I knew that it could get me the rest of the way.  By now, the time in between each contraction spaced out again, giving my body some much needed rest in between my pushes.  With each break, all I would say was "Drink," signaling my mom to give me the glass of coconut water to sip.  For every push, I gripped the towel in front of me and twisted with deadly force.  Amy noticed this and told Chris that he was needed.  All I remember was Amy's voice saying "Chris... Julene... towel... cross hands...pull..."  She told him to cross hands with me and pull when I pulled on his hands to create counter pressure. This was AMAZING advice.  I felt that each push was way more effective, and it felt much easier.  I became Amazon Woman. I reached so far into myself and found strength I didn't know I had. I brought it to the surface and used this strength to push.  This was one of the most empowering experiences of my birth. I didn't realize until after labor that I was actually yelling into Chris's ear the entire time too, and he temporarily lost his hearing in one ear because of it. 

With Traci behind me, she could tell me exactly how much progress I was making. With each contraction she was able to see more and more of Kaden's head. "The top of his head is starting to appear if you want to feel it," she said. I reached down to feel his head.  It felt a little slimy, especially since we were in the water.  Honestly, it kinda wierded me out, so I just felt his head that one time. I needed to focus on getting the rest of him out anyway.  "It looks like he has light brown hair," she continued. "Told you so," I said to Chris.  After one hard push, Traci told me that his head was completely out and that with a couple more pushes the rest of him would be out.  I knew I was close to the end, but that there was no need to rush because Kaden was still getting all of his oxygen through the umbilical cord.  Traci told Chris that if he wanted to catch Kaden, he would need to get back by Traci so she could tell him what to do. "Nah, I think she needs me up here."  And he was soooo right. 

My next contractions were just as intense, and I worked hard to get the rest of him out, but once his head came out, it became a little easier to get the rest of him out.  I kept pushing and pushing and didn't realize he was out until I heard Traci say, "Here! You can take him now!" I looked down and there was a baby in the water beneath me. Traci had caught him and was handing him off to me so I could take him out of the water.  After only 30 minutes of pushing, he was in my arms.

I pulled him out of the water and put him close to my chest. "Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh!" I kept saying it over and over. I leaned back to the edge of the pool.  Traci gave me a blanket and a little beanie for Kaden to rest in so he wouldn't get cold.  Kaden was perfect. I couldn't help but notice how calm he was. Once he was above the water, his breathing reflexes took over and he began breathing through his nose. His first breath of air above the water ensured me that he was perfectly healthy. Traci waited for the umbilical cord to stop pulsating before she let Chris cut the cord.  

I just wanted to hold him forever. He seemed so content in my arms.  There was no baby screaming, no worries about who was doing what to my baby. All three of us just sat there, soaking up each other's presence.  I am so grateful that the birth went so well and that Kaden is so healthy.  I couldn't believe that our little family just grew by one more person. 

Welcome Kaden Christopher Bateman. Born July 23rd at 1:32 pm. 10 lbs 7 oz, 15 inch head, 22 inches long  and perfect in every way.                                                                    

Thank you to everyone who was in attendance: My mother, Danille; sister, Sydney; aunt, Amy; mother in law, Rebecca; sister in law, Cassie; midwife, Traci; birth assistant, Chelsea; and of course, Chris. You all made the birth that much more precious!